Wednesday, April 7, 2010

The Best Years of Your Life?

The idea for this post came to me as I was struggling to fall asleep last night at approximately 3:30am, when I had to be up at 9am, and I was generally feeling frustrated with the college lifestyle and the sense of confinement I feel here.

Now, two caveats. The first: I just got back from spring break. There is no way that I can see Williams in a favorable light right now, since all I want in the world is to be back on the beach in Hawaii, sipping Mai Tais.

Caveat number two: I love Williams. I really do. This isn't so much an issue with Williams specifically, but more college in general.

That being said.

Everyone you talk to, and I mean everyone, goes on and on about how their college years were the best years of their life. But the more I think about that, the more I start to realize: really guys? Really?

Cause here's the thing. I think that college can be the four most tumultuous years of of someone's life, and while that can certainly lead to growth, it can also just get really, really old. I truly believe that many people, but for the most part men (sorry guys) are also at their least emotionally mature while they're in college. I say this because acting like a moron in high school is one thing, but at 21? 22? It's time to grow up and act your age, and yet there are just beezys running all up and down campus, throwing themselves and their bodies at guys who totally don't deserve it, while guys treat women with the same amount of respect they'd give a doorknob.

I'm not gonna say that I don't enjoy an occasional toga party or two, and that going out on weekends isn't quite possibly the only way to survive what is probably the equivalent of a 60-90 hour workweek once you take academics, studying, and activities into account. But can I also say that--gasp--I'm kind of over it? That, at the end of my junior year, I'd much rather go out for a glass of wine with my girlfriends on Friday and stay in--say what??--with my boyfriend on Saturday and watch a movie (preferably something with Paul Rudd).

Maybe it's because I'm in a serious relationship. Maybe it's because suddenly all I seem to care about is dogs, home decor, and my career aspirations--none of which really exist on a college campus. I hate when people spill beer on the counters in the kitchen when I want to cook and it's sticky and messy. I hate when people throw up outside my door at 3am. I hate that I can't paint my walls and screw nails into the wall and I hate, hate, hate that my work is never done because I'm always "bringing it home with me," so to speak.

I know I'm going to miss college when I graduate. Maybe all I'll be able to do come this time next year is curl into a fetal position and cry at the sight of my resume and the thought of a 9-5 workweek.

But doesn't everyone agree that the "best years of your life" should include things that really matter? Like getting married? Or having your first child? Or getting your dream job? Or truly making a difference in the world--not in the minuscule community that is your college, but the real world. Like adopting a pet (or child) that otherwise would have died. Or teaching English to inner city kids. I'm ready for all those things now. And frankly, the beer-counters and vomit-hallways and toga parties are really just standing in the way of my adopted-puppy-Ikea-purchases-constant-salary-making-a-difference-and-living-my-real-life-filled future.

5 comments:

  1. I completely agree! College was fun, but I wouldn't qualify the years I spent in college as the "best" years of my life. I have a feeling the best is yet to come...(too cheesy?) I am glad you had a good spring break! XO

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  2. Welcome back my dear! I've got to catch up on your blog. I agree with you so much. I lived it up in college, but they were in no way my best years. My most spastic, out of control, emotional rollercoaster, alcoholic years to be sure. I would say these post college years where I know who I am, and I've actually got a little money in the bank (yayyy no more ramen!) have been the best years of my life, particularly the last two. And I'm with Katherine, the best is yet to come.

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  3. I probably would have written this EXACT post in college. And also in high school. I'm always looking toward the future (it's one of the biggest things I need to work on, actually, stopping and enjoying the present), but I know what you mean. I would say my first year of college was ONE of the best years of my life to date. And the last week after my college graduation was one of the best weeks of my life, to date. But that's only in retrospect, you know? And I'm sure I have many more great weeks and years ahead of me. The only advice I can tell you is to just enjoy.it.now. I know you're over it, trust me, I know, but someday you will be far enough removed from college to reminisce (I just got to that point recently) and you'll finally say things like, "college really was pretty awesome." :)

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  4. I agree with you entirely! I actually graduated from college a year early - I did it mainly because of what you're feeling right now. I was in a serious (and long-distance) relationship, which made me feel like I was in a different place than everyone else, and I was just tired of the frat parties and the roommate drama, and just everything. I got 2 reactions about that - adults thought I was just the smartest, most over-achieving person in the world (though that really wasn't th reason I was graduating early) and people my age who didn't know me well thought it was because I was either a terrible loser or totally crazed (I'm neither, yet, I don't think).

    2 years out, I don't regret it, I don't regret being in a serious relationship in college, and I don't feel like the best years of my life are over. I feel like they're starting now! Don't stress about that. I feel like if your best years are high school or college, you peaked early, and are just destined to be a toothless loser later.

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  5. KA- Not too cheesy at all! Haha

    DG- Thanks love! I think that is what I want most of all-- financial security.

    Maureen- Well that is exactly what this blog is about, haha-- I am such a compulsive planner. But this isn't even about planning anymore-- I'm just restless and not really happy anymore. It's time for a change. And then I'll be happy to look back and remember all the great times!

    Meredith- Sometimes I wish I could do that! Williams doesn't let you graduate early. Pretty hardcore. I don't think you're either yet either ;). And just say no to toothless losers.

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